25 Things About Me

I got tired of being tagged with this ubiquitous meme, so I decided to do it using 25 randomly generated facts “about me.”  So here they are:

1. I believe only mentally deficient people want anti-gravity boots taught in schools.
2. I went to a camp where we tried to eat bags of Doritos all summer.
3. I joined Mr. T’s organization to destroy the environment.
4. On grandpa’s farm one summer I tried to piss off a sasquatch.
5. My daughter thinks Ben Folds sounds like a George Foreman Grill choking a castrated buffalo.
6. MC Hammer’s music always makes me feel rancid.
7. My favorite part in Plan 9 from Outer Space is when Bill O’Reilly is shooting the beaver in Mexico.
8. My favorite part in The Matrix is when Leo Laporte is scaring the gerbil in Paris.
9. I saw Jimmy Eat World using a butter sculpture of Princess Leia in utero to disgust a sasquatch.
10. My second cousin thinks Kanye West sounds like a Xbox 360 petting a rude weasel.
11. I’m addicted to my stapler, and never put it down. Even when I’m dancing with my step cousin-in-law.
12. I once dated Chuck Norris in high school.
13. My favorite part in Finding Nemo is when George W. Bush is whipping the guinea pig at my kid’s choir concert.
14. I got Timbaland’s entire discography autographed by Miss Teen South Carolina on my birthday.
15. I joined Barack Obama’s organization to eradicate drug abuse.
16. I got Lady GaGa’s entire discography autographed by the terrorists on my birthday.
17. I saw Jimmy Eat World using a life-size Yoda in Russia to educate a hippo.
18. I’ve been known to frighten William Shatner with my Kindle 2.
19. I love my family even though they are always searching for the Loch Ness monster.
20. I went to a camp where we tried to create new jobs all summer.
21. I often put on some Twisted Sister and think about how to frighten small children with my dad.
22. My second cousin laughs like a retarded donkey.
23. I think my cousin is the best in the world. I love it when he is riding the camel.
24. My mom thinks Fall Out Boy sounds like a iPhone torturing a insane goat.
25. Whenever I can, I like to hang out with Apple zealots.

And there you go.  25 random things “about me” as generated by the BBSpot Random Thing About Me Generator. <– Warning, there are some things that might be generated that you might find offensive.  I had to generate more than 25 things to populate my list.